I walk in the air, between the rain, through myself and back again. Where? I don't know.

Easy To Be Wrong

If you understood how hard it was for me to learn to trust you
If you knew how much it meant to me when I finally did
If you could remember me the way I used to be
You might be sorry for some of this
When did you decide not to care about other people?
When did you decide that yours was the only valid perspective?
When did you decide that we were beneath you?
When did you decide that everyone was unless you deemed otherwise?
How can you live like that?
Why would you want to?
What's the attraction?
Sheer unaccountability?
Freedom?
A license to ignore your emotions?
Elitists don't make ministers.
They just don't.
They make rulers.
And God doesn't need someone else to sit in judgment on His children.
So I ought to just shut up and let it be.
I should just leave this and turn the other way....
No.
I can't.
I have to at least understand it
Pull it apart at the seams so I can see how it works
Find out where the line is between breaking rules and breaking trust
Draw my own boundaries again
Find myself back at the beginning where I left her
Remember that someone breaking trust is no excuse for not trusting
Remember that I am flawed and broken
Remember that we're all in desperate need of grace
And I'm in desperate need of distance from you
And I'm getting it.
It's the only thing saving my brain.
No, wait, that's lack of sleep.
It's so easy to be wrong, isn't it?

Copyright ©2003, Emma N. Davis

posted by Emma @ Thursday, September 25, 2003